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This week is fun and laughter time. If these jokes don't make you giggle, nothing will. Love and laughter everyone. Wife to partner. ‘You would be a good dancer except for two things.’ ‘What two things?’ asks her husband. ‘Your feet.’ A man goes to the doctor. 'Doc, wherever I touch, it hurts.' 'What do you mean?' 'When I touch my shoulder, it hurts. If I touch my knee, I scream, and when I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts.' 'I’m not surprised; you've broken your finger.' A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for nearly half an hour before finally hanging up. 'That was short,' said her father, 'you usually talk for two hours. What happened?' 'Wrong number,' replie


The irresponsible lending of the banks continues so this, perhaps, is appropriate. GREEDY GOBLINS The goblins owned the bank and made the rules. If I like it – it’s mine. If it’s in my hand – it’s mine. If it looks like mine – it’s mine. If I think it’s mine – it’s mine. Everything else is mine too. The trolls were enraged with their avarice so submitted alternative rules. If you like it – it’s mine. If it’s in your hand – it’s mine. If it looks like yours – it’s mine. If you think it’s yours – it’s mine. Everything else is mine, not yours. The goblins closed the bank. The trolls destroyed it. Now, it is one big hole.


Attack by Rick Haynes I wanted to write something a bit different by using some Old English words. Thus, I've written two parts to the tale. The first is written in English. Once you have finished reading, you will see parts of the story retold in Old English. Attack Moving slowly through the bracken, the warrior constantly looked around, searching for any sign of the enemy. His helm was dull and covered in dirt, his tunic and trews faded with age. Pitted after so many battles, even his sword lacked lustre. Only his dark brown eyes set in an old face shone in the fading light. The sound of bold voices carried on the gentle breeze and instantly, the man lowered himself below the foliage. Like


NO TIME TO PARTY by Rick Haynes Padding silently through the dense foliage the werewolves sought a high point to observe their quarry, and the edge of the cemetery proved to be the perfect spot. It had been a long time since they ate, and the smell of humans wafting on the breeze had turned their stomachs over like never before. Slavering at their mouths, they looked at one another, knowing that the kills would be swift, and the flesh exquisite. As the dancing at the Halloween party below reached frenzy, they sensed their golden opportunity grew closer. Razor-sharp teeth gleamed in the moonlight. They saw their prey exposed in the dazzling lights around the DJ. Long howls would soon ring out

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