RICK HAYNES

This week, I showcase a Drabble from the lovely, Val Portelli, closely followed by two of mine. CALENDAR FOR WORKING LIFE AND RETIREMENT BY VAL PORTELLI Monday- Back to work, train delays, probably raining. Tuesday -It’s been a long week. Wednesday – Keep your chin up- halfway there. Thursday – Getting closer. Friday – Finish the 9-5, too tired to rock. Saturday – Party time or PJs? Sunday – Day of rest, recovering before starting all over again. Monday- Noise from builders a

A Tale From The East End By Rick Haynes I was a bit Brahms and Listz to be honest. So all I wanted was a Jimmie, but a bit of J Arthur wouldn't go amiss. Then this horse and cart walks into the wrong bog, her raspberry ripples hanging out. I couldn't Adam and Eve it. She had the biggest Bristols I had ever seen and blimey, what a boat race. She gave me such a butchers, took hold of my Chalk Farm and led me into the cubicle. She held my Hampton in a firm grip and blimey what a

Another round of jokes to entertain you. I keep asking my husband if he thinks I'm a complete idiot. And he keeps saying, 'no way, there are definitely parts missing.' Trying to explain what happened in the league cup final between manager and goalie proved very difficult. Here is the discussion I had with my wife. “Who was Chelsea’s keeper, she asked?” “Kepa.” “Don’t be silly, what was his name?” “Kepa, his name is Kepa.” “And who is the manager, she demanded?” “Sarri.” “Th

BIO Firle Lewes is a writer and poetician inspired by the notion that life doesn’t necessarily have to make sense, as long as it is fun - and that humour can cast a bright light into even the darkest of life’s shadows. BLEATING HEART - A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing The wolf was struck by cupid’s dart, He couldn’t ‘still’ his beating heart, He was dumb and she was smart, Although, he thought, she’s quite a tart. He tried cross-dressing as a sheep, There was no sign of young B