ITALIAN JOKES

I watched a television programme about the past and current culture of Sicily.


I give you a joke or two from a salt farmer on the island.



Two policemen are walking down the street.

One is looking at his mobile and walks headlong into a - DO NOT STOP -sign.

He looks up and reads the sign.

Shrugs his shoulders and carries on banging his head against it.


My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party, dressed as an Italian island.

I said, “Don’t be Sicily.”


Luigi and Paulo were out fishing in the Mediterranean sea one day when a World War II mine came floating along.

On seeing it coming nearer and nearer, Luigi shouted at his friend “Hey Paulo, it’s a mine, it’s a mine!!!”

Paulo replied,” Okay Luigi, you can-a have it!”


And from Rome.



Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?

He sadly pasta way.


He just ran out of thyme

Here today, gone tomato

Ashes to ashes - crust to crust

There's just not mushroom for Italian chefs today


What do you call an Italian suppository?

Wait for it - an innuendo.


Why do Italian men have mustaches?

So that they can look like their mothers.


What does FIAT stand for?

Frenzied Italian At Traffic-lights.


Back to Sicily.


What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe? Roberto.


A Greek and an Italian are arguing over whose culture is superior.


The Greek says, "We built the Parthenon."

The Italian retorts, "So what, we build the Colosseum."

The Greek replies. "We came up with advanced Mathematics.

"But we made the Roman Empire."

The Greek is getting frustrated but finally believes how he can win the argument, "We invented sex," he shouted.

The Italian replies, "True, true, I can't argue with that, but we thought of having it with women."


What do you call an Italian with a broken arm?

A speech impediment.


What do you call an Italian with two broken arms?

WAIT FOR IT - MUTE





I hope you enjoyed my collection of jokes from the Mediterranean.


Thanks for reading.


RIck.


P.S. Whatever you do today, tomorrow, next week, etc. Have some fun along the way. You know it makes sense.










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