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The Case of the Dead Man

“My lord, I call the forensic pathologist to the stand.”

“I swear by almighty god that my evidence to the court and the jury shall be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.”

“Now Mr James I need to ask you some questions about the deceased. Did you carry out the autopsy?”

“I did.”

“Did you check for a pulse before you performed the autopsy?”


“Did you check for blood pressure?”


“Did you check for signs of breathing?”


“Is it therefore possible for the patient to be alive when you began the autopsy?”


“How can you be so sure?”

“Because his brain was sitting in a jar on my desk.”

“But nevertheless, could the patient have still been alive, with modern science being what it is?”

“I suppose so, yes, he could have been alive and is now practising law somewhere.”

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